Explaining your faith and values with confidence

At university you may meet people who have never met someone from your faith, or anyone religious at all. Questions are usually curiosity, not attack. Short, calm answers help you feel confident and help others understand.

Why people ask

• Most questions come from genuine curiosity: 'Why don't you drink?', 'Why do you pray at lunchtime?', 'What is Diwali?'.
• Research for UK universities (the 2011 Equality Challenge Unit study, summarised by Advance HE on Wonkhe) found that most staff and students did not feel they faced discrimination because of religion or belief.
• You may also be asked by people of your own faith who practise differently. Everyone's practice is personal.
• You are not an official spokesperson for your whole religion, country or culture. You only need to explain what it means to you.

Short answers that work

• Prepare a one-sentence answer for the questions you hear most. For example: 'I don't drink for religious reasons, but I'd love to come along.'
• On prayer: 'I pray at set times during the day. It takes about ten minutes, I'll catch you up.'
• On dress: 'I wear a headscarf because it's part of my faith. I'm happy to talk about it if you're curious.'
• On food: 'I eat halal, so I'll check the menu. Anywhere with vegetarian or fish options usually works for me.'
• Childline's advice on saying no applies here too: you do not need to over-explain or justify yourself.

Handling harder questions

• If a question is complex ('What does your religion say about...?'), it is fine to say: 'That's a big question and I'm not a scholar. I can tell you what it means to me, or point you to someone who knows more.'
• Ask a question back: 'What made you curious about it?' This turns a challenge into a conversation.
• If a conversation becomes a debate you do not want, close it politely: 'I'm happy to agree to disagree. Shall we get food?'
• Never feel you must defend every news story about people who share your faith. You can say you do not support harm done in anyone's name.

When questions become disrespect

• There is a difference between curiosity and mockery. Repeated jokes, insults or pressure because of your faith are not acceptable.
• In the UK, the Equality Act 2010 protects people from discrimination on the basis of religion or belief, including lack of belief, as the University of Surrey's procedure notes.
• Universities have harassment and bullying procedures. Surrey's specifically includes antisemitism and Islamophobia, and its chaplaincy staff offer confidential pastoral support.
• Keep a record (dates, what was said, screenshots) and talk to your personal tutor, the Students' Union advice centre or the chaplaincy about reporting.

Confidence without arrogance

• Speak about your own faith positively rather than by criticising other people's beliefs.
• Show your values through actions: honesty, kindness, keeping your word. People often learn more from how you behave than from what you say.
• Remember that the Values and Character and Purpose modules cover respecting others' beliefs; the same respect you hope to receive is what you give.